


Hang Up the Phone

by call_me_by_charmie



Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017) RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Armie is still married, Break Up, Breaking Up & Making Up, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Romantic Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:49:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26032969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/call_me_by_charmie/pseuds/call_me_by_charmie
Summary: "And the phone keeps ringing… Until it stops. And that makes Timmy’s heart sink – but it’s what he wanted, wasn’t it?"Timmy realizes Armie is not going to change his life because of him and hanging onto each other isn't fair to anyone. It's time to let it go. Will this be the end of the random luck of the universe?
Relationships: Timothée Chalamet/Armie Hammer
Comments: 17
Kudos: 81





	Hang Up the Phone

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> This fic is inspired by an incredible song called "Do Me a Favour" by Anson Seabra. I am planning a series of oneshots inspired by his songs, so stay tuned if it's something you'd be interested in.
> 
> This plot has probably been used hundred times before, but I really loved writing it. Beware, there's a lot of angst, but I hope it's all worth it in the end :)

Timmy wakes up at half past 10 to his phone ringing. His eyes puffy from all the crying, his pillow still damp with the tears. His heart broken.

He tries to ignore the phone, but whoever is calling doesn’t relent. But he knows who’s calling and he won’t pick up, because this is it. He won’t let Armie talk him into hanging on a little longer. And then longer and longer, while nothing changes.

It’s all slowly coming back to him. All that was said the night before, promises that would have meant everything if he hadn’t heard them a hundred times already.

He’s never heard Armie sound as broken as he did when he realized that this time, Timmy’s already decided and is determined to let go. Let go of the stolen moments and lies. Let go of the empty promises. Let go of the love.

***

Armie was filming in LA and got a day off, so they agreed he would fly in to New York, before Timmy left for England two days later and would be filming all over Europe for the next few months.

They spent the day together in Timmy’s apartment, just catching up. In the evening, after the darkness fell over the city, Timmy insisted they walk around their favourite places. He seemed off. Sorrowful almost. A few times, Armie thought he even saw a glint of tears in Timmy’s eyes, but attributed it to their oncoming separation.

The feeling of something being wrong didn’t leave Armie. If they were not supposed to see each other for a long while, Timmy usually asked Armie to fuck him hard, so he’d feel him for days. But this time, when he asked: „What do you need, baby?“, Timmy got this almost sad expression and whispered: „Make love to me, like it’s the last time.“

So Armie did. He didn’t voice any of the million questions that were going through his head. He didn’t oppose. He made love to Tim tenderly, because it seemed to be something the younger man needed. But as they lay in embrace, Armie felt Timmy’s tears dampening his chest hair and he had to break the silence. Because this wasn’t the blissful silence of the afterglow. This was the unbearable silence of melancholy.

“Tim?” No answer. “Timmy, what’s wrong? I know it’s gonna be a long time apart, but we’ll manage. Like we always do. And I’ll try my best to fly over at least once.”

“Yeah, and what are you going to tell Elizabeth?” Timmy spat out, sitting up straight on the bed.

“Timmy…” Armie reached out to touch the delicate shoulder, but Timmy flinched away.

“Don’t Timmy me!” he almost shouted. “Sorry, shit. I wanted to do this calmly.”

“Is this- This is not about you leaving for Europe...” It started as a question, but the harsh reality of what was happening started to dawn on Armie. Timmy’s words _make love to me, like it’s the last time_ , ringing in his head.

“Look Arms- Armie, I don’t really know how to do this. It’s not like have a ton of practice, I haven’t really had many chances to do this sort of thing.” He was starting to ramble and nervously rubbed his neck.

“Timmy, don’t do it,” Armie’s voice quivered.

„Armie, if I want to have any sense of normality in my life, I need to let this go. I need you to let me go.” It was breaking Timmy’s own heart as he was saying it, tears welling up in his eyes. He furiously wiped them away, almost mad at himself for not keeping it together. He had already decided, so he had to get it over and done with.

„But I can’t lose you.“ And Armie’s voice sounded so raw, it almost shook Timmy’s resolution.

„At least you had me in the first place. I can’t say the same.“ You couldn’t blame him for being a little bitter. He got up from the bed and put on his boxers.

Armie caught his forearm, making Timmy face him. „You did. Have me. You always had me.“

“Did I? Did I really have you, Armie?” He gesticulated wildly, shaking Armie’s hand off in the process. “What I had were secrets, cancelled plans, stolen weekends with no real plans for the future. I can’t live off of the breadcrumbs you leave me here and there. Because at the end of the day, you go back to your wife and children, but I’m on my own. In a limbo, waiting for you to make me feel alive. And that’s not fucking healthy, Armie. I can’t live like this. Not anymore.“ The anger and desperation seemed to bubble up from nowhere, but it helped Timmy get some of his footing back.

“Timmy, please. I’ll find a way,” Armie pleaded.

“But that’s exactly it, Armie! There are only two ways to do this. And it’s clear which one you chose. Or maybe you didn’t choose, it would be unfair to make you choose anyway. So,” he took a deep breath, “I’m doing that for you. This is an out for both of us.”

“Timmy, I promise. I will figure out how we can be together, I’ll come up with something. Let me make this right.” Panic creeping its way into Armie’s voice.

“Don’t promise me something, that you can’t really give me,” the voice sounded strange even to Timmy himself. He sighed. “You can’t make this right, this is goodbye Armie. We can’t keep on hurting each other.”

Armie stood there dumbstruck. Was this really the end? Is it possible to end everything they had just like this? No. Armie was not having it.

“Timmy, I-“

“You should probably pack your stuff, so you don’t miss your flight.” With that Timmy walked out of the bedroom and closed himself in the bathroom. What Armie did not see, was Timmy sliding down the wall, tears rolling down his face in waterfalls.

Armie looked at the clock and realized, that Timmy was right. He had to get going if he wanted to catch the red-eye to LA. That’s when it hit him. Timmy planned it this way. Timmy knew he had to catch this flight if he wanted to make it back to work on time; that way they wouldn’t have time to argue any more. Timmy had really decided for them.

So, Armie put his clothes on, threw the rest of his things into the bag, not really caring about any of it getting crumpled. Then he sat back on the bed, head in his hands. How did they get here?

Timmy emerged from the bathroom fully clothed a few minutes later, just when Armie got a notification about his Uber being there. He handed Armie one shirt that he had left in the bathroom earlier.

Armie took it and stuffed it in alongside the rest of this clothes (and one of Timmy’s shirts, that he maybe took on purpose but would say it was an accident if asked). He shuffled to the hall, tied his shoes, took his duffle bag and looked at Timmy, both barely holding back tears.

 _Please don't leave, I take it back,_ Timmy thought. “I’m sorry, but it’s for the better,” was what he said.

 _I love you._ “Goodbye, Armie.”

***

It’s late afternoon in the New York apartment and the phone keeps ringing. A cold cup of coffee forgotten on the kitchen counter being the only witness to Timmy’s misery. He wishes Armie would do them both a favour and hang up the phone. He can’t pick up because he knows he’d fall for the broken sound of Armie’s voice and give in. But for some reason he also can’t bring himself to turn his phone off. It’s like he’s hanging onto the last bit of Armie he’s allowed himself to have.

And the phone keeps ringing… Until it stops. And that makes Timmy’s heart sink – but it’s what he wanted, wasn’t it?

So, why does the silence feel like a death sentence?

Timmy knows he needs to finish packing, since he’s leaving the next morning. But he feels like he’s suffocating. He spent part of the day packing up – well, crying and packing up - the things Armie had in his apartment into a box. Some spare clothes. Old scripts. His toothbrush. Now the box is looming in the corner of the room, like a reminder of what he gave up.

***

Timmy’s been in London for a few days now. He checks the date. It’s the day of the Hammer Gala that Armie will attend with his wife. Obviously. They were talking about it before. Armie hated these events from the bottom of his heart, but he had to be there – his family wouldn’t forgive him skipping it. He’d probably never hear the end of it from Elizabeth, either.

He reminds himself not to check social media for the next few days, since he couldn’t handle Armie and her acting like a perfectly happy couple for the cameras. But it was his choice, what was Armie to do other than try to save his family?

Timmy shakes his head, trying (and failing) to clear his mind. No, that needs something stronger. So, he heads to the kitchen and reaches for the bottle of Appleton in the cupboard, but it’s empty. Right. Didn’t he buy it just yesterday? Or was it two days ago? He sets it on the counter and rummages through the cupboards in hope of maybe finding some forgotten bottle.

That’s when he hears a tentative knock on the door. He thinks he maybe imagined it, but there’s the knocking again. He wonders who it could be – there aren’t many people the guards would let up.

He unlocks and opens the door – cursing himself, the next time he should definitely look through the peephole, to check who he was letting into his apartment. But when he looks up everything stops. Okay, maybe he’s being dramatic, but it does feel like the world stops spinning for at least a millisecond.

There he is, looking back at him with tired eyes, dark circles under them, but still handsome as ever.

A simple “Hey,” that sounds a lot like relief.

„Armie…” he breathes out. “What are you doing here? You’re supposed to- It’s the gala thing today.” He steps to the side to let Armie in, who awkwardly follows, uncertain of what the code here is.

Timmy notices and motions to the sofa. “Make yourself comfortable.”

Armie exhales a sigh of relief, glad Timmy won’t kick him out, and collapses on the couch. And then the flood of words and emotions starts.

“Tim- Fuck, Timmy. I am so sorry. You have no idea how much. I can’t believe what I did to you- what I kept doing to you. I was so fucking selfish, and you were right about what you said in New York. I should have never let it get this far. I cannot believe I let you feel like you were just some dirty secret, when in reality you-“ They lock gazes. “-were everything.” Armie’s eyes are full of tears. “I hate myself for hurting you and for putting you in that position. You were always here for me and I was rarely there for you-“

“That’s not true,” Timmy interjects.

“I just… Timmy, I’m so fucking scared. I’m scared to just... take the leap. It will change my life drastically. I’m terrified of my children despising me one day.”

“Fuck, come here.” Timmy’s voice cracks a little on the last word as he draws Armie into a tight hug.

Because this is new. This is the first time Armie opens up to Tim this way. They skirted these topics before, but Armie always shrugged it off, changed the topic, faked a smile. And Timmy didn’t feel like he could push him. Like he should push him. You can’t force someone to face their issues; it could do more harm than good. So, Timmy waited for Armie to be ready, but it never came. Until now.

He can feel Armie crumble in his arms.

“Oh, Armie…” Timmy rubs Armie’s back and the nape of his neck soothingly.

After a little while Armie takes a deep breath and leans back so he can continue.

“But that’s not all. Yes, I am terrified of my children despising me, but I realized that I won’t lower the chances of that happening by staying in an unhappy relationship for the sake of… I don’t even know what. When I found someone so incredible, who for some reason wants to have anything to do with me.” He stops suddenly and averts his gaze.

“Or did, at least. And I am also sorry for not entirely respecting your decision of us breaking up, but I love you. I love you Timothée Chalamet, like I’ve never loved anyone before. You showed me this boundless, unconditional and unguarded love and I thank you for that, because I didn’t know such thing even existed.”

Timmy is absolutely speechless. He opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. He’s overwhelmed with emotions and he knows Armie knows, because he smiles at him. He could always read him like an open book. Armie is clearly not done yet, because he continues.

“And I don’t want you to feel any pressure for what I am going to tell you now. I want you to know that I don’t expect you to change your mind or anything. We had a long talk with Elizabeth, there was a bit of yelling, but that’s not important. Anyway, I told her, that we should end it, because neither of us is happy – and has been happy for a long while. She didn’t even put up much of a fight, because she knew it was true. Even the kids noticed.” Armie reaches out for Timmy’s hand and he lets him take it.

“With that being said, I want you to know that I am all in if you wanted to give us another chance.” He looks up; eyes hopeful.

And this is it, this is what Timmy was waiting for. Sometimes, you have to go through difficult, heartbreaking things to get where you were always meant to be.

“I would love that,” Timmy nods as he finally manages to speak.

“Yeah?” They grin at each other.

“Yeah.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading <3 All kudos and comments are deeply appreciated - it's what keeps us writers going. :)


End file.
